The Scariest Place On Earth

This evening, I got dragged to the Bloomingdales for White Trash -- better known as Wal-Mart. I absolutely despise this store. It's crowded, noisy, and mostly full of useless junk that is manufactured in China. My true hatred for Wal-Mart runs deeper, but cannot be explained in a few mere paragraphs. An excellent description of Wal-Mart's business ethics are detailed in Naomi Klein's No Logo. There are numerous copies available at Amazon.com. If you haven't read this book, what are you waiting for?

Wal-Mart puts me in the worst of moods. I can only put up with so many spoiled, bratty kids before I start considering that it would be an ideal time for a random act of violence against a complete stranger.

Have you ever had a good look at the people at Wal-Mart? I'm not just talking about the staff, I'm also talking about every patron who wanders those fluorescent-lit isles. What a sorry sight. This has got to be the worst place on Earth to pick-up women. Next time you get dragged there, have a good look at the people. I swear I have never seen one good-looking person in that building. I get depressed just watching all these losers, dressed in their tattered rags, wandering the isles with their vacant eyes, with 2.5 kids in tow, buying more useless junk for their mobile home. I am almost ashamed to be in that store.

I figure I can mock White Trash, simply because I am White Trash myself. I work a blue-collar job that barely pays a living wage; I live in a White Trash neighborhood, and I get drunk at White Trash bars.

But I am fighting very hard, so that one day, I might crawl out of this demographic, and become a middle-class suburbanite slob. I suppose I can then make fun of Yuppies.