Little Mosque on the Prairie

It's about time that Muslims aren't portrayed on prime-time television as Christian-hating war-mongering radicals.

Now let's see how long it will take the American media conglomerate to start showing shows like this. Consider how long it took American television to portray African-Americans as successful, law-abiding citizens. Some might argue that even that hasn't happened yet.

Totally Wired

This is quick reminder for everyone that I am going to be on television tonight.

I am going to be on tonight's broadcast of "Wired", at 11:00 PM MST, on the Calgary feed of the A-Channel.

I hope many of you will have the chance to tune into the show.

The rest of the week I'll be performing at Trapper's Pub and Grill in Calgary. If you can make it, I'd love to see you there.

If I can get access to a computer, I may have some spare time to write an entry and update you on my experiences. Otherwise I will write again once I return from my road trip.

Take care, everyone.

Here Go Another 15 Weeks...

This post is complete irony with respect to my previous post. This week featured the debut of the third season of the Apprentice on NBC. Looks like I'm going to be spending many Thursday nights in front of the boob-tube.

I hate reality television. Absolutely despise it.

But I am hooked on the Apprentice. I think I like the business theme. I can do without all the cat-scraps though. The first two seasons began with pitting the males against the females, and more often than not, the females all fought amongst one another, usually over some petty issue. In contrast, this season we are seeing college graduates being pitted against those who have only a high-school education. I consider this is an interesting concept. In the end, I think experience will prevail over intelligence.

I have been in video-game mode this last week, so I apologize for not updating this site. Earlier this week I successfully finished Myst III with a nominal amount of hints. The final puzzle was hard as heck, but I had figured out many of the clues as to simplify the problem. I was quite proud of my ingenuity.

Since then, I have been playing NetHack again. I haven't been having much luck, as I keep dying at the hands of my own (apparent) stupidity. I have learned a few neat things though, perhaps I will one day get a character that will be powerful enough to see the bottom of the Gnomish Mines. I apologize if you have no idea what I'm talking about.

There are so many commands in NetHack, that it could potentially take a player years to figure out all the applications of the commands. Many of the items have unexpected uses if you apply them to commands you would otherwise not usually consider. I find this amazing from a game that when compressed, nearly fits on one 1.44 MB floppy disk. Then there are the new (i.e. popular) games that can only fit on DVDs. That's what a heavy reliance on graphics does.

Why I've Abandoned Hope on Television Programming

Last night, when I should have been sleeping, I came across a television program called "Unexplained Mysteries". It was one of those shows that deals with UFO's, Government conspiracies, Alien bodies, and eye-witness accounts of abduction. I ended up getting some amusement out of the show, but while lying in bed afterwards, I was considering the validity of the show I had just witnessed.

I would like to believe in many things. I would like to believe that there is intelligent life out in the universe (I often think there certainly isn't any on this Rock); I would like to think that we will be contacted by these beings in my lifetime. I would also like to believe in other ideals, such as world peace, the end of poverty, disease, and even government corruption. But I am a skeptic by nature.

I have seen many shows like the one I saw last night. In fact, every one of these shows are the same as the other. They show the same old footage; they discuss all the same issues in every show: Alien crash-landings in New Mexico, preserved bodies of extraterrestrials in top-secret military bases, and experimental fighter planes based on alien technologies. They feature retired military officers claiming these events actually occurred, but have no definitive proof due to the destruction of classified documents. On top of all this bunk, these programs display faces, pyramids, and other structures on Mars that cannot be explained as natural phenomena. I am not sure if the purpose of these shows is to make believers out of us, to scare us, or to undermine credibility of our Governments.

What struck me, is the "spin" that these programs put on these shows, as if they could actually succeed in exposing the "truth" to the masses, that the United States Government has been lying to the people for at least the last sixty years. This is not unlike the "spin" that the US media portrays the civil unrest in the Middle East, or the spin that Al-Jezeera puts on the same news. I continued my thought processes and dug a little deeper into the issues at hand.

I thought, what if it were true that the United States government had definitive proof that extraterrestrials existed? Would they share that information with the public? According to the show I witnessed last night, they said "no", which I tend to agree with. The government would fear that if the public were to know that extraterrestrials existed, then a moral panic of unprecedented proportions would ensue, and the government may be unable to control the public. Upon further thought, I concluded that the US Government is right-wing conservative; some would even argue that the separation of Church and State has been blurred in recent years. One cannot deny that the proof of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe would have a profound effect on our spiritual beliefs. On a similar tangent, I would not be surprised if "the Church" still has a significant amount of influence within "the State", even up to the highest levels of government.

[ed. note: If you think I'm treading on thin ice, you are probably right. I am trying my best to be as general as possible as to not piss everyone off. If you hear me out, you might be surprised in the direction I take this.]

I would like to believe that some of the reported UFO sightings were from extraterrestrial beings. I would like to think the US military has an alien craft in a hangar in some top-secret military installation (I would also like to believe that if this were true, that the alien technology is so advanced, that military scientists do not understand the technology so they cannot implement it into their own military vehicles or weaponry). The more I think about it, I do not believe that the US military has such evidence.

In 1961, Dr. Frank Drake proposed a formula to mathematically determine the probability of intelligent life existing in our universe. The equation is as follows:

N = R × f_p × n_e × f_l × f_i × f_c × L

Where:

N = The number of communicative civilizations
R = The rate of formation of suitable stars
f_p = The fraction of those with planets
n_e = The number of planets in the system that would be capable of sustaining life
f_l = The fraction of those where life develops
f_i = The fraction of life sites where intelligence develops
f_c = The fraction of planets where technology develops
L = The "lifetime" of communicating civilizations

The numbers are arbitrary, but generally we are looking at a very small number. When we consider the possibility of extraterrestrial life landing on our small blue planet, the number gets even smaller.

If we were to be contacted by intelligent beings from elsewhere in the universe, it would surely be in the form of radio waves (sure, science fiction fans love to talk about "sub-space" communication technology that travels faster than light, but we have no knowledge if such a thing exists. If it did, every computer geek on the web would want that technology, as cable modems and email aren't fast enough for them). Radio waves have the ability to travel great distances without substantial loss in signal quality. There are many government-funded programs designed to listen to these radio waves for signs of intelligent life. The SETI@home program is an unprecedented attempt to listen to these signals with more precision than ever before. After being operational for some seven years, using millions of years of computer processing time, and identifying many potential candidates, not one legitimate signal has been discovered by the SETI@home program.

Of course, many believers will argue that we have received signals from intelligent beings, but the Government has classified the information, so civil order can be maintained. This is simply not true. What "Unexplained Mysteries" (and other similar programs) fail to mention, is that the Earth rotates; stars rise and set. Extraterrestrial civilizations do not make person-to-person calls.

In order to make contact with an alien civilization, a signal has to be sent into space at an incredibly high amplification. The message would have to be repeated countless times, not just for years, but centuries or millennia. The vastness of space is so large, that if an intelligent race existed on the other end of our galaxy, it would take one hundred thousand years for that signal to reach us. It would take another one hundred thousand years for us to return their signal. By the time they had received our signal, our civilization (as we know it) would not be around. Even so, given the vastness of space, we would have to be listening at precisely the right time in order to acquire the signal; so would they.

If an alien civilization were to try and contact us, it would likely be a very faint signal. We would receive that signal many times; and every radio telescope in the world would be able to tune-in. If such a candidate signal was discovered, the news would not be be kept secret for long. I consider this definitive proof that there is no possible way that the United States government would be able to intercept an intelligent signal from outer space, and classify it without the rest of the world knowing. How can you classify a signal that's intended for all of us? And not only us human beings; what about the rest of the Universe?

It is more likely that if intelligent life exists outside of our solar system, it is so far away that we would never be able to return the signal in our lifetime. It is even more likely that there is nothing more than noble gases out there. But I like to dream of the alternative.

The idea of "Area 51", a top-secret air force base (that even the government denies its' existence, regardless of whether or not it exists) having an extraterrestrial craft in their possession is almost unbelievable. Again, this has to do with laws of percentages. To crash-land on an uncivilized area of the United States is like hitting a bullseye target from the moon. The United States covers a small percentage of the surface area of the earth. If an interplanetary craft were to crash-land on the Earth, it would most likely land on water; two thirds of the Earth's surface area is covered in water. To have the US military cover up such a crash-landing up with few (or no) witnesses is another slim chance.

Now if such a place exists such as "Area 51", I would expect it would be more a testing ground for new military technologies, but I doubt these technologies are alien. The majority of UFO sightings are debunked as military vehicles. Some are even debunked by natural phenomena.

We haven't even yet examined archaeological evidence. There are many accounts in historical records of strange beings visiting primitive civilizations, operating strange machinery, in both the Middle East and in Central American civilizations. Besides folklore and wall paintings, there are no artifacts to prove that extraterrestrials have visited this planet in the past. Furthermore, I would argue that no extraterrestrial beings have not visited us, as even now there is "no sign of intelligent life" on this planet. Unfortunately, I don't have the time to discuss the uncanny precision of the construction of the pyramids (or other archaeological discoveries that are normally featured on similar television shows); that will have to wait for another entry.

As for those who claim to have been abducted by extraterrestrials and subjected to "testing", I would love to have psychological assessments on these people. I wonder how many of them habitually abuse hallucinogens, how many of them are schizophrenic or suffer from some other debilitating mental disorder, or how many of them are just craving attention to the degree that they will say or do anything. Many people who have suffered abuse in their lives have what is known in the professional community as "repressed memories" -- which is a nice way of saying that their experiences were so traumatic that they actually made themselves "forget" these events actually occurred. If you consider that many of these abuses are allegedly similar to acts of sexual exploitation, you can probably understand how these people might believe they were abducted by aliens, rather than subjects of abuse.

People believe that extraterrestrials would treat us in the same manner we treat other species of our planet. I don't think that these "aliens" would feel any guilt inflicting pain on us for the advancement of their knowledge. I am opening another big can of worms here, so I should probably reserve this issue for another entry.

What I think, and what I want to believe are obviously two different things. I hope that I have provided convincing evidence that we do not yet have definitive proof of extraterrestrial life. With the development of new technologies, it might end up that we might discover that we are not alone in the Universe; I hope in the process we might be able to discover a bit more about ourselves.

Right Place, Wrong Time (a.k.a. Not-So Real TV)

It has been a bit of an adventure re-reading the entries from my 1999 tour journal. Memories that have since disappeared have come flooding back to my consciousness, and with them have returned the feelings of exhilaration, drunkenness, fatigue, anger, frustration, longing, and in some cases infatuation. At times I can hardly believe I am the same person. It's been five long years. Reading these entries is all it's taking me to realize how boring my life now seems.

I have been paying particular attention to my writing style. While I have been transcribing these journal entries, I have also been doing a great deal of editing. There are scores of extraneous information that many readers would not understand. This is the type of relative information that "you had to be there" to understand. This of course, just will not do in this context, so I am often paraphrasing passages in order to make them more relevant to everybody.

I am also revising the language. I am removing a great deal of the profanity, probably because I feel that it just isn't necessary. Some strong language will remain, if I feel the words are warranted.

Names and identities are also being censored. I may employ initials to represent people I have met, or create pseudonyms for all of them -- I have not yet decided. I fully expect that I will use Dave and Arleen's names throughout the journal, as many of you already know who they are.

By far the biggest change to the journal is the incorporation of CSS and html. When these journal entries were originally published, they were written in emails that could only support plain text. At the time, I had little knowledge of html programming, no knowledge of blogs, and I had no means of digitizing photos. This time around, I can hyperlink and add images. The experience should be more vivid this time around, and hopefully I can tell the story the way I wanted to in the first place.

It amazes me how quickly technology advances. I remember in 1999, how I thought it would benefit me if I could take a laptop with me on those long journeys. I could have written emails by the dozens, I could have checked my email on a regular basis, and I could have been a little more entertained than what I was (boredom was a serious problem while on tour). Back then I did not have the finances to afford an expensive laptop or a digital camera. In some cases, the technology wasn't even developed yet. Cellular phones with built-in digital cameras did not exist. Wireless internet technology was in its infancy, most people never had heard of a thing called a 'blog', and the only kind of internet connection most people were familiar with was known as "dial-up". To connect to the internet via a cellular phone was so expensive, I would have had to spend all my bread on airtime fees.

If I were to go on a similar tour today, I would be taking a digital camera-phone, as well as a laptop, and I would be documenting my tour in extreme detail. I would be taking photos of every club, every hotel room, every restaurant I ate in, and every person I met. People might think I was crazy pointing that cell phone at everyone and everything, but I know that on-line journal would become a hit.

People like to pry into the personal lives of strangers. This explains why blogging has become so popular, which is the same reason why Reality-TV has been dominating Network Ratings for the last five years.

Not-So "Real" TV

Those of you who know me personally also know that I have an utter dislike for reality-based television. It could be because I consider it the crack-cocaine of prime-time television programming, or because of the trials and tribulations that the producers put these 'civilians' through are so far-fetched and unbelievable that I just find this form of entertainment nauseating. I think the true reason why I hate Reality TV is because I think the viewers (i.e. the general public) are getting the wool pulled over their eyes.

I am sick of all the television commercials that state: "and don't forget to tune in this week to witness the shocking conclusion that will leave you in disbelief. All this and more on this week's episode of __________." There is something in these statements that really bother me. Do these television executives really think I have an IQ of 65, and I believe everything the television tells me? That's the first problem with America today is that they are conditioned to believe everything they see on television -- like they are actually winning the Iraq war.

Some of these shows are so unbelievable that I begin to think that Reality TV closely resembles Wrestling.

Reality television producers have a few tricks up their sleeve that they would not like the public to know about. First of all, it's not entirely "reality". The producers will often edit and delete entire passages, sequences of events, or subplots, and take them out of context to create drama. The point in case is if you watched last night's season finale of NBC's the Apprentice. Stacie J was eliminated in one of the first episodes of the season, ousted by her female competitors who coined her as "unstable". This revolved around some footage showing Stacie J at the Mattel headquarters, playing with a Magic 8-ball trying to divine her team's success. The footage of the show suggested that Stacie J was wasting precious development time, while the rest of her team was slaving away. This footage came back to bite her, as Stacie J was eliminated within a few episodes.

Last night's live finale episode featured Stacie J explaining the Magic 8-ball footage. She explained that the 8-ball didn't come into play until the team had finished their task. Not only that, but what was strangely absent was the footage showing most of the entire team playing with this Magic 8-ball. So I consider this definitive proof that the producers of the show deliberately used this footage out of context to create drama. The producers also knew that the other female candidates would conspire against her, citing her superstitious tendencies, and use that for dramatic impact.

The other part of the formula to Reality-TV success is cast selection. Before I get into too much detail in this, I should probably explain that the main premise of reality television is the Darwinist ideology of these shows. The weakest are systematically removed one by one every week until one ultimately remains. This is not necessarily the case given the "rules" of the show, as often the strongest contender is often voted out by the weaker majority.

What viewers might find surprising, is that contrary to popular belief, the producers of these reality TV-shows often do not pick the strongest applicants to be featured on the show. The applicants are first selected on basis of aesthetics. That's right. Where television is concerned, appearance and/or sex appeal takes precedent over everything. Once the uglies are cast out, the candidates are put through a number of aptitude tests as well as physical training. But
then a strange thing happens, the producers do not choose the strongest candidates to be featured on this arbitrary reality show; they often choose the weakest candidates!

No why would the producers do such a thing? The answer is simple. Drama is created not in the successes, but in the failures. Drama is also created in forcing people with abrasive personalities to work together. This of course, results in power struggles, fights, backstabbing, temporary alliances, and a whole lot of filthy language -- a recipe for Reality-TV success (hey, everybody loves dialogue with incessant beeps).

The context and theme of a Reality-based television show is rather arbitrary. The theme is only to catch the attention of target audiences. Think: The Apprentice - people in business or business school; The Biggest Loser - overweight audiences; Joe Millionaire - single greedy females [ed. note: The Smoking Gun has cited that much of this series was a farce -- including the lead male role]. If you removed the main theme from all these shows, they would all be the same. Darwinism without the carnage.

This week I have heard on the radio that the TV-ratings for Reality-based TV shows are plummeting. What surprises me the most that it has taken the average American about five years to figure it out. That being said, how many other Reality-Television series are complete farces?