Speed Bump

This morning, my trusty iMac got a healthy dose of power. My friend (who happens to be a computer technician) and I installed an additional 512 megabytes of RAM, bumping the total RAM available up to 768 megabytes. The operation was quick and painless. We had the cover off and back on in under 2 minutes. To quote my friend, "It doesn't get much faster than that."

Upon reboot, the change was immediately noticeable. Applications launch immediately, and games don't "skip" or "pop". As I write this, I am monitoring SETI@home, and it appears that I could shave an hour off my workunit time.

Checking the system profiler, it was determined that OSX was using 256 megabytes alone. This pretty much meant that prior to the RAM upgrade, the operating system was monopolizing the system resources; any additional running programs were running under virtual memory.

I now have a computer that I am completely satisfied with -- at least for today. In a few years, this machine will become a dinosaur and will require replacement. When that happens, I imagine I will be raving about the next model. Sadly, the depreciation of technology is inevitable.

Piles Of Rock

Last night a few of my friends and I attended the Müle Shöe CD-Release Party. Entitled Piles of Rock, their CD is a reflection of their influences and roots. Take 2 parts Led Zeppelin, throw in 2 parts of Van Halen, and equal parts of Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, and AC/DC, and you would have something that sounded like Müle Shöe. The theater was packed, though a strange crowd. Müle Shöe is generally known around the local bar scene, but at least half of the theater was comprised of the under-18 crowd. They seemed to enjoy it all the same.

Yes, it was louder than heck.

After the concert, my friends and I found a watering hole to sing a few Karaoke numbers -- pretty much our intent was to have a few beverages, and show off our vocal talents. The bar was packed, which meant that we weren't going to be able to sing more than one or two numbers. So I picked Cheap Trick's Surrender, and CCR's Proud Mary, two numbers I have only sang once before, but I knew I could pull them both off.

With Proud Mary, you know that the whole bar is going to sing along. I heard them all singing over the PA. Of course they loved it. I was just relieved that nobody decided to jump on the stage and "help me out".

I nailed Surrender. I was also paying close attention to the crowd, as last time I sang this number it was in an empty pub, and I couldn't gauge whether or not this would be a song that the patrons would appreciate. We had a winner. There were tons of people singing along -- even a few patrons "banging their heads" to my performance. In addition, there were numerous screams and applause after my performance.

Today, I feeling the after-effects of last night's outing. I think I should be taking it easy for the rest of the day.

Yet Another Karaoke Bar

On my way to work a few weeks ago, I noticed a sign in front of Orleans North that they would be having Karaoke every Friday night. This is obviously a ploy to drive more patrons to the bar. In the last ten years, this bar has undergone numerous name changes, and despite its fair size, cleanliness, and classy decor, it can't seem to develop a patronage of any sorts.

I actually wanted to check out this Karaoke evening a few weeks ago, but I have been ill with this nasty cold, and my voice has been shot. I am still coughing a bit, and my voice is still not 100 percent, but I thought I was well enough to check it out.

We made it to Orleans North shortly after 10:00pm. My predictions were correct; the place was empty. There were a couple people singing -- no more than three; the pool tables were vacant, and the only area that was busy was the Video Lottery Terminal area. Not one of the dozen or so machines were vacant. This would explain how Orleans North manages to stay open despite having an empty club. I needn't say that the VLT patrons were the least bit interested in anything else that was happening around the bar. A bomb could have gone off in the parking lot, and those gamblers would still be plugging quarters into those machines.

My thoughts about gambling (and problem gamblers) will have to wait until another post.

Getting up to sing a song here was no problem at all. In two hours, I managed to sing about a dozen songs, as the "competition" wasn't terribly fierce. The DJ called me up to sing my first song about 30 seconds after I submitted my first request -- Steppenwolf's Magic Carpet Ride. I figured that I should still stick to some easy songs to get a feel for how my voice is healing. My voice was still quite shot at the previous night's Grease rehearsal.

Once I got used to the Karaoke system (and their hot microphones), I nailed the song. I kindly thanked the "crowd" -- the two or three people clapping, and the DJ then said something about me "making it to the finals".

Apparently in December, they want to have a "finals" competition with all the best karaoke singers who manage to wander into Orleans North -- complete with cash prizes for the top three contestants. I wonder what kind of competition this is going to be, given the low attendance. How will they choose a winner? I was snickering under my breath at the fact at how easy it was "making it to the finals".

This young girl sitting in the front promptly asked me if I could sing duets. She was specifically referring to Grease's Summer Nights. The question was of course, serendipitous given the fact that I will be starring in the play next week. I accepted her offer, and we were singing the duet in about fifteen minutes.

I did sing a bunch of my old "tried & true" numbers over the course of the evening. It has been years, but I sang Skynyrd's Sweet Home Alabama, as it's bloody easy, and I don't have to read the lyrics, as I sang this song three thousand times during my tenure in Legacy. I tried a few numbers that I have been itching to sing, but either the songs weren't available in the Karaoke database, or I was too chicken to try singing them in front of a large crowd. Example, to get up and sing Prince is a risky operation in Redneck Central. I gave When Doves Cry a shot. Though the song is not terribly high pitch-wise, it is much tougher to capture the nuances. The song that I was most pleased with my performance was Cheap Trick's Surrender -- those who know me also know how much I like the song.

My overall thoughts regarding Orleans North is mixed. I like the fact that I don't have to wait long, and I can sing as many songs as I please. On the other hand, I do miss the fan appreciation. I have spent so many nights playing and singing in dead clubs that it can get depressing. It plays mind-games on you. You start thinking that people don't like your music; or that people are ignorant and don't care for live entertainment anymore.

I may attend these rumored karaoke "finals" if my time permits it. I gave it a bit of thought this morning, and if I happen to win a cash prize, I will donate the winnings to the local food bank.

No Time For Work; More Music!

My Thanksgiving weekend has been an absolute blur. Friday night was spent in a number of different pubs around town, gigging with a few friends and singing Karaoke. This week's karaoke experience was similar to the previous weeks'; I got a lot of compliments and admiration from the drunks. I went a little out of my element for song selection, as I do not like singing the same songs week after week, so I tried three numbers that I have never done before. I warmed up with CCR's Proud Mary, which I totally nailed. For some reason I thought the vocals were much higher (in pitch) than what it was.

For my second song, I decided I would try one of my favorites: April Wine's Tonite is a Wonderful Time -- which I did very well, except for the last verse. There is a nasty key change, and the vocals go way up there. Sure, it's easy for a female to sing, but a male has got to squeeze those cajones really tight to hit those notes. I managed the best I could, but my voice broke a few times. The karaoke DJ said that she'd drop the song down a key the next time I sing the song. That should help considerably.

I decided to be daring for that last song, and I decided to not give a damn about what anybody else thought of me, so I got up and sang the Eagles' I Can't Tell You Why. This is a particularity challenging song, as the vocals are so high, and much of the song is sung in falsetto. There were a few bad notes, but for the most part I was happy with my performance.

When I had finished the song, the whole bar fell asleep. I guess they wanted to hear something upbeat. I know that some of the songs I have chosen got good responses regardless of how well I sung them. Trooper's Raise A Little Hell comes to mind. I sung the bridge of that song horribly, but the patrons could have cared a less. The entire bar were banging their heads, fists clenched in the air (think Beavis and Butthead), singing along.

We did not stay for me to sing any more numbers, I was expected to make an appearance at another pub that evening. But I may have to return to that karaoke bar in the near future; it appears that I am developing a bit of a fan base there. Too bad I am too old for Canadian Idol. Not like I would ever audition for that show anyway. I will have to provide my reasons in some other post. But if you would like some insight as to why, please view my previous post here.

I managed to stuff myself full of turkey with the family on Sunday, and spent much of the evening trying to install important software on my brand new iMac. There is still a lot of software that I will need to transfer, but since my laptop is completely non-functional, I will have to solicit a computer technician to rip my laptop apart and retrieve the information stored on the hard drive. Sadly, the laptop did not have a CD burner, so there was no way I could back up some 30 gigabytes of data.

My Monday wasn't so much of a holiday, as I spent much of the day in the recording studio. A musical acquaintance of mine is writing an album for submission to the big five record labels: BMG, Sony, Universal, EMI and Warner. This happens to be the bass player I helped play a gig with the past weekend. He sent me some demos of the songs on email, and I was pleasantly surprised at the songwriting. The general sound is reminiscent of Default or Nickelback, but there are differences. I felt the songs were quite marketable, so I told him that I'd help him out and cut the drum tracks for him. Monday afternoon I managed to cut three drum tracks. There are apparently many more to do. At the least, I could get performance credit on a CD that might make it in the hands of some very important people.

Last night I was at Grease rehearsal when the unexpected happened. I have now been cast in the play as Johnny Casino. Now I have lines to learn in addition to my hefty musical responsibilities. Looks like I will have to shave my beard off and cut my hair for the part. Important information regardning Grease tickets have been posted below.

Oh, by the way, I have already been asked to play drums for the next musical theatre production: Anne of Green Gables. I have given them a preliminary "yes".

Krappyoke

I had the oddest experience on Saturday night. We went to a quiet neighborhood pub in hopes of having a late dinner, and walked in the door to find a Karaoke DJ setting up the stage for the remainder of the evening's festivities. So much for a quiet evening. After dinner we decided to stick around to see if the bar was going to get packed with amateur singers, or if the atmosphere was going to remain relatively peaceful.

Now for those who know me, you will know I usually avoid Karaoke bars like the plague. If your Karaoke experiences are anything like mine, you will understand: Packed, smoky bars, overpriced drinks, with an overly loud Karaoke system, waiting 2 hours to sing one song while being tortured by horrific off-key renditions of songs you never wanted to hear in the first place, and when you finally get your turn to sing "American Pie", you find that every person in the bar is now your best friend and are crammed on the stage helping you sing the song. This is not my idea of a good time.

This particular pub that I was at on Saturday night was quite small, and not terribly busy. I guess that there were only about 25 patrons in the pub. It seemed that I might be able to squeeze in a couple quick numbers with the Karaoke machine before the bar gets packed with countless wannabe Canadian Idols. I was not prepared for what was in store for me this night.

I was the first to volunteer, and I warmed up with Cherry Poppin' Daddies' Zoot Suit Riot, which isn't a particularity hard song to do, but it has some scatting, something karaoke regulars often have trouble with. Not only that, but you don't often find Karaoke regulars singing swing. I got a particularity modest response, as I expected few patrons would be listening, or even care for that matter.

It soon became obvious that not many people were going to be there, as some tables quickly left, and were replaced only by a few tables of the Baby Boomer Generation. There was only about four or five people that were interested in singing, and I was getting badgered to get up there again and sing another song.

So I hastily found the Eagles' Take It Easy, a very easy tune, and submitted the request to the DJ. I figured with the age group present at the pub that singing some late sixties and early seventies songs might be the ticket for getting some appreciation on the stage. Within three minutes I was up there singing the song, and my idea seemed to be working. This old fellow sitting next to me said I did a great job and asked if I knew any other Eagles songs. I shrugged and told him that I probably knew a few more, but you got to be careful with Don Henley's voice, as he can hit some pretty high notes. I had a feeling that he wanted to hear more Eagles, and I was also getting the feeling that I was the only Rocker in the crowd, and everybody else wanted to hear Country. For all those who know me, also know that Country and I get along about as good as oil and water do.

Well the next thing I knew, I was getting called up to the stage to sing songs I had not submitted. It is a little flattering, but mostly annoying, since you are often coerced into singing songs you do not know in the least. It is a situation I don't care about, as I do not like being stuck up there with material I don't know.

I did get a few compliments about my Karaoke abilities, but I didn't say much more in response than a simple "thank you". This younger couple returned to the pub after leaving for an hour or two just to hear me sing some more -- or so they had told me. Another younger fellow wanted to pay for my bar tab. I began to feel like I was a star in that little pub, and I began to feel that pressures that comes with such privileges. People were trying to tell me that I could sing better than Kalan, others were trying to encourage me to write music. All I heard out of that gibberish was the beer and whiskey talking. I got out of there after seven songs, the last three being material I was not comfortable with, and were out of my vocal range. If I didn't get out of there, I would be singing until three in the morning, and not by my choice either.

I have had some good experiences with Karaoke, but generally, my dislike for Karaoke runs a lot deeper than I had previously mentioned. For me being a professional musician, I have to thank Club DJ's and Karaoke machines for replacing me. There is hardly any place left for live music, and if there is, there is no money in it. Twenty-five years ago, you could be a professional musician and never have to leave the city. You would work six nights a week, make good money, and play a circuit of the same six or eight bars in the city. Clubs with Disc Jockeys were the exception rather than the norm, and Karaoke was well over a decade away. People went to clubs to dance and watch a live band.

Today, you can find Karaoke being offered in at least half a dozen bars and clubs on any given weekend in my little city. Every bar has some form of canned music, either a Disc Jockey or Jukebox. The live music scene has all but dried up. And not just here, it's the same story all over North America -- probably Europe too.

Whatever happened to all the live music joints? I think their entertainment budgets have been getting smaller, their operating expenses have risen, and greed has taken over. It costs far less to hire a DC, pay for a Jukebox, or hire a Karaoke business than it costs to hire a band. A band still has a lot more entertainment value than any of the other options, in my opinion. It's quite boring to watch a jukebox. Disc Jockeys aren't that much more exciting either.

I know if the live music scene here were like anything it was a quarter century ago, I would me making music locally full-time, and I would be quite happy. I would probably be making more money than I am now, and having a much better time while I was at it too.